Okay, I’m the first one to admit that I was skeptical about these so-called ‘healthy’ smoothies. The kind that promise to melt away the pounds while giving you the energy of a caffeinated squirrel. I mean, every other day there’s some new claim that involves kale, which—surprise!—ends up tasting like a well-blended garden. But I met my match with these smoothie recipes that aren’t totally horrendous. So, here we go.
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The first one I tried had a shockingly good mix of ingredients. Like, who knew putting avocados in a drink could not make you gag? We’re talking a mash-up of avocado, a handful of spinach (don’t roll your eyes), and a splash of coconut milk. Honestly, it wasn’t so bad. Add a spritz of lemon and it’s practically a health martini. Doesn’t that sound fancy?
Anyway, my blender has seen better days, and now I’m pretty sure it’s plotting to quit on me, but what can you do? I found that mixing in some berries—like a frozen berry medley with strawberries and blueberries—makes it less green and a tad more pink. That’s gotta mean something, right? Oh, and it makes you about 50% less likely to feel like you’re drinking lawn clippings.
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Then there’s this weird kale concoction that butchers think is the king of healthiness. It mixes almond butter (random, but surprisingly good), a banana (like, obviously), and a smidge of cinnamon. Oddly, tastes like a dessert. But don’t quote me on that if you’re not a fan of oddly spiced sweet drinks.
So, do these smoothies check the ‘weight loss’ and ‘energy boost’ boxes? Who knows. My guess is that they mostly stop you from ordering that sugary coffee drink with a whipped cream mountain. Maybe just don’t substitute them for actual meals—or do, I’m not your mom. My eyes still hurt from staring at these recipes, and I’m thinking about that time last week when I tried a ‘chocolate’ smoothie that tasted like mud (not worth it). Ugh.
